I realised after yesterday that when I let my routine slip, my emotional mind falters and crashes. Then I have to nurture it before it descends again into the depression that I was swimming in last year. I am not going there.
Today, I headed out into the empty streets thinking of Boris, BoJo, the Boris Johnson of Brexit fame. Why him you ask? I have had little interest in him until I saw he'd been admitted to intensive care. He's 55! He's got a baby on the way (well his partner has). He's got the best treatment in the world but it might not be enough. I had another slight panic moment where the hypochondriacal me (that has been developing in the fertile womb of my quarantine life), stood up and said this could be you if you go home. But I chose to ignore it. I walked and I breathed in the fresh air (only saw one car in the hour that I walked) and took photos of the emergence of spring that was all around me. Hollyhocks, wistaria, potato vine, tulips and daffodils. I was buoyed with photographic material. All was right for a time. I even came home and christened the paints and finished two paintings for my online course!
Then I put up a post I found this morning called: Which Quarantine Bird Are You? I chose the Fairy Wren - Gets out of PJ's every day. Still does make-up. Day-drinker. The first two are correct, the third I pride myself on having not succumbed to but...I have become an afternoon pre drinks person. That was an unexpected consequence of the quarantine and at some stage I will have to forgo it but tonight's cocktail hour superseded all others. I bought one of those Cocktail mixes (Daiquiri) and knowing that usually they are weak, I thought I'd top it up with some Rum and added some bruised basil leaves. Within minutes I had the giggles, within minutes the daughter and I were revealing our souls. The daughter's partner was busy cooking so she didn't have the time but still she did reveal her admiration for Elvis and we bonded like never before. Elvis, the love of my 8-16 year old self! We ended up watching him in action in Jailhouse Rock which is appropriate at this moment because we all all imprisoned by this virus and we are learning to live a very different life than before. Interesting times for those who haven't succumbed to the virus and those that have and who've survived. Living with fear is what many people do on a daily basis, in war, with compromised immune systems, within the home, without a home. Surely at the end of this we will have stronger empathy systems in operation. We can but hope.
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