I am not alone.

Just when you think we're on our way to recovery...we're not. The whole world is sagging under the weight of Covid. Our emotions are on a rollercoaster of hope, despair and an attempt of resignation. I no longer look at holidays I might take, even in our country; things change daily now.

Speaking to others, bed has become our refuge, we nestle there if we can; Netflix, Stan etc have become our respite from the daily news; we think of having birthday/dinner parties but then realise things could change before we can follow through; artists I follow on Instagram, are saying creativity has plummeted to zero levels; University students can't socialise within the environs of the university; people who can still work must live with perpetual worry that clients, students, patients may have the virus. Everything is becoming an effort; do we risk going out for pleasure any more? Do we have the energy to fill in all the paperwork if we do? I braved a cafe this morning. I was greeted with a smiling face and the phone photo tap. There were questions to be answered; temperature to be taken; order to be done and paid for online and all I wanted was a piccolo coffee! Definitely not worth it, for them or me. If I go again, I'll order a meal as well, and take a friend. I would have felt guilty going alone but the place was almost empty. I was thinking of maybe taking myself out to dinner but would feel bad about taking up a table for one. As I drink my tiny coffee, the daughter sends me a Covid -19 update for our area - 2 new cases. Where have they been? Here, where I sat?

I decide I have to do something semi creative and am proud of the fact that I filled up a whole day accomplishing that endeavour. I'm going to revamp the lounge room. Lounge to sell, one to buy on sale , paint to decide on, purchasing the paint. Creativity without actually having to come up with ideas. I congratulate myself on my creative, non creativity. The man in the paint shop said everyone has been buying paint, they've been selling out. I am not alone.

Ps. Next post will be about my year travelling last year. It's time to take a look back.

That's me in the middle thinking: Is it worthwhile going to a cafe again?

Spring cleaning the rabbit hole.

The second coming is arriving. My last post was about tentative hope, now we have tentative anxiety creeping back in. I've been down redecorating the rabbit hole and haven't written in a while. My creativity has listed dangerously to the edge of an abyss, like a lot of people who've found it hard to settle and search for a way forward in this strange new world. I've noticed that a lot of potters and painters whom I follow on Instagram are stuck in the vortex of this unsettling time. I admire the people who can move through this pandemic and keep up optimism. I haven't been one of them for the last couple of weeks. When deep in lockdown and hotel quarantined, I was inspired! You couldn't hold me back! Now I've succumbed to the collective uncertainty, which is something I don't think we, as humans, deal well with. People, to whom I've spoken to overseas, especially in America, are feeling the weight of depression as the possibility of movement to other countries is getting further away.

And as for hugging - it wasn't in, then we ventured out of the hug-free zone, and then our need for physical touch took over and we dared hug briefly and now, distance is the new norm again. Our bodies, I think, are confused and nervous.

At the moment, there are very few glimpses of normalcy for us to view ; therefore the refurbishment of the rabbit hole seemed like a good idea. A spring clean of frayed parts of me, of letting go of faded beliefs that no longer serve me; are a couple of good things happening down here.

So until things get a little more certain, it's not such a bad idea to head down to your individual rabbit holes for a bit of a spring clean, throw out the old, bring in the new and get ready for the release from this fear that's surrounding us. Oh, an order a mask while you're at it.

How I'd like my rabbit hole to look, eclectic and vintage.

Paralysed will. Time delayed.

My new life of last blog is being delayed due to Covid. What to write about now that the quarantine restrictions have lightened significantly in Australia; at least, for now. There are articles appearing about the renewed threat, the second coming so to speak but for now, we are fairly safe. As long as we don't venture far. We aren't allowed to. This is almost as bad as the fear of the virus. Not being allowed to, is something that is apart of our childhood, not our adulthood.

I went to my chiropractor because my sleeping, like so many other's, has been derailed significantly since the pandemic has plagued us. He uses EFT, emotional freedom technique as well has chiropractic. It involves tapping on meridian points to release issues. He said so many people have come to him with 'paralysed will' because our freedom has been curtailed. Something we, as a generation, have never experienced before. And yes, it's for our own, and other's good but the significance mentally of this virtual imprisonment within our state, within our country, brings with it angst and fear. Fear that if we have a sneeze, could it be the big C? Should we be tested, should we isolate immediately or is it just a bit of hayfever? Our whole heightened awareness I think is causing us sleeping issues. The fact that there is so much uncertainty about how life will go forward, postulated and repeated by the media is enough to keep us awake at night. I know I shouldn't keep abreast of the news but it's like Pandora's box and the temptation to check is always there.